


The shadows of the past

by AyaTheFanGirl



Series: The New Family of Marcus Keane [3]
Category: The Exorcist (TV)
Genre: M/M, Marcus looking for his place, Marcus retiring, Mentions of Rape, Peter is trying to help, Sex, domestic life, mentions of child abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-23
Updated: 2019-11-23
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:21:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21538153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AyaTheFanGirl/pseuds/AyaTheFanGirl
Summary: ten days after he moves in with Peter and a week after the final battle, Marcus has a lot to think of
Relationships: Marcus Keane/Peter Osborne
Series: The New Family of Marcus Keane [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1547278
Kudos: 4





	The shadows of the past

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [I've got my mind set on you](https://archiveofourown.org/works/13404669) by [reckonedrightly](https://archiveofourown.org/users/reckonedrightly/pseuds/reckonedrightly). 



Up until ten days ago Peter woke up to the mixed noises of his alarm and his dog Addie’s panting and barking right in time to get ready for work and have breakfast, but things had changed when Marcus moved in with him. Marcus woke up with the rising sun and while he tried not to disturb his lover’s sleep, Peter always woke up with him and realized immediately that he liked it, he enjoyed watching the sunrise from his bedroom window while feeling Marcus next him, it is in those precious early hours of the morning that Peter and Marcus look at each other and think silently in the same moment “this is really happening, and it’s good”.

They have an easy enough routine to follow: they watch the sunrise, maybe make love, have breakfast then Peter goes to work, leaving Marcus with Addie. Marcus would take Addie to a walk in the forest, cleans after her, goes back to the house to spend the time: sketching, reading, making small messes and cleaning them up and of course praying. Kneeling down in the guest bedroom with his Bible on the bed in front of him and his hand clutching the rosary his daughter Talia bought him to replace mother Bernadette’s rosary, which he gifted her 24 hours after they met for the first time in her mother’s house. Then Peter comes home and they cook dinner together, have dinner together, talk about the day and watch nature documentaries on Netflix before Marcus calls Talia, then calls Tomas and then they take Addie outside, then go to _their_ room, make love and sleep naked and holding each other.

Last week was important for Marcus and Peter because the final battle was all over the news, high ranking members of the clergy, businessmen and politicians were gathering all over the world in soundproofed hotel conference rooms in the exact same time, when many of them started falling dead, and some of them were seriously ill, while others were just fine, conspiracy theorists picked up a pattern when they realized that a hotel in Missoula, Montana was the last to be hit by this strange phenomenon and the first hotels that were hit were the farthest from this hotel, they demanded that the public know what happened.

But how the survivors of that day could tell anyone the truth? that some of the people in those conference rooms were integrated demons waiting for their master, that those of them who died were integrated willingly, and those who got ill were forced into it, and those who neither died nor fell ill were greedy idiots who thought that giving up their humanity was gonna make them great in every possible and impossible way. But the part of the week that mattered most to Marcus was a phone call that came from the archdiocese the morning after the battle.

His frenemy father Bennett insisted, despite being sick from six months of forced integration, to sort out the mess caused by the war, starting with Marcus’s excommunication. so on Thursday Marcus received absolution and declined an offer to regain his collar, the bishop who met him wasn’t surprised and he even promised a to send Marcus all the papers he needs to be able to get a job including, a recommendation letter that doesn’t include the e word, the file indeed arrived in Peter’s mailbox yesterday with a thick envelope labeled _retirement money_ that went to the bank before it was opened ,on the insistence of Peter. During the weekend they celebrated by taking Peter’s boat for a joy ride, then heading to the mainland for a fancy dinner, their first as a couple, and on Sunday Marcus went to mass and came back to Peter feeling light as a feather, he doesn’t remember a time when taking communion felt so good.

Today however was a Wednesday, another week day in which he will be alone with Addie for hours, waiting for Peter and trying to do something with himself, and this dreaded loneliness was clear in the way he held into Peter’s body this morning in bed, it felt tighter than usual. “I can call in sick today” Peter said looking into Marcus’s eyes,

“don’t you dare” replied Marcus in a low voice and a firm tone “Peter, I need to know how to handle my issues on my own”,

“where is that coming from, Marcus?” Peter said worryingly.

Marcus took a deep breath, shifted his body to fully face Peter’s and said “Peter, you are my rock in this life, and I don’t know what i would do without you” Marcus paused to swallow then continued “but you have issues of your own, and it would be foolish to assume that the day when we are both too emotionally screwed up to get off the bed in the same time won’t come” Marcus paused again looking at Peter’s focused expression then said “and with my daughter being all the way down in California, and my best friend back in Chicago and has other problems, I need to know how to handle myself”.

“I understand” Peter said sounding less worried but just a little,

“we needn’t worry about this now my love” Marcus said gently pushing Peter on his back with a wicked smile slowly spreading all over his face,

“no?” asked Peter while smiling,

“no” repeated Marcus moving down Peter’s body, throwing the covers away. He took a moment to admire Peter’s muscular frame and tan skin, before he started teasing his lover’s half hard cock with his tongue, kissing it then taking it in his mouth as it gets harder, “fuck, Marcus” said Peter with a smile in his voice as reaches for Marcus’s head, stroking it gently. Marcus is usually submissive during sex, he lets Peter hold him down and do whatever he wants and he enjoys it too. He is also usually frustratingly shy in bed, but there are moments when he is not, when he just asks for what he wants of Peter, and this is one of those moments and Peter savors every detail of it.

Once Marcus’s finished they fell back into their routine. After taking Addie on her second walk, but two hours before Peter is to come back at 6 Marcus gets on his knees in the guest room as usual and prays the rosary. It’s familiar, calming and soothing, but is it enough? What he told Peter was a real possibility and this is why Peter accepted it quickly, after he finished the rosary he clutched it between his hands and asked God for guidance, he asked of his Lord and the only real father he knew to show him a way to survive the darkness in his mind, and the strength to help his beloved survive the darkness in his, “ _Amen_ ” came out of his mouth with more vulnerability than ever before, he crossed himself as he heard a car pulling over and went downstairs to greet Peter.

Ninety minutes later they sat down to eat, Marcus was happily digging into his share of the pasta he and Peter made, aware that during those last few weeks he has been consistently getting nice homemade food and grateful for that, Peter however was gazing at his lover from across the small dining table thoughtfully, when a few minutes into the dinner Marcus noticed “is everything alright?” he asked cautiously, Peter’s job was different from his stint in the army, but it couldn’t be called _easy_ ,

Peter interrupted this train of thought when he replied “I was thinking about what you said this morning”.

Marcus sighed and looked down at his plate, he knew what Peter meant because he’s been thinking about it too and he didn’t want his lover to worry, “Marcus, listen” Peter interrupted his thoughts again “you know that during my bad days I have a support system that you lack,” he paused looking at Marcus’s face and knowing that his lover already regretting ever talking to him about it and he might be feeling guilty about it too “now, the fact that both Talia and Tomas are, despite the distance, a phone call a way and that you can go to church now is admittedly a good start, but you need to build on that”.

Peter was right, as usual, Marcus spent 70% of the last ten days inside this house and that’s not good, “so there are things that could help with that” said Peter calmly,

“go on” Marcus replied with calm voice and the same regretful expression “we need start working on your resume” said Peter.

Marcus was dumbfounded for a minute, “the only two jobs I ever had” Marcus replied “were exorcising demons and loading and unloading craters from fishing vessels on the docks,” he paused for a breath “I know that I need to find work, but the idea of a resume and a job hunt is alien to me”.

“like the idea of having a child was, till not so long ago?” asked Peter carefully “and the idea of being with someone who loved you?” Marcus nods resigningly, so Peter keeps pushing “the file and letter that were sent to you from the Vatican will be very helpful” they spoke volumes of Marcus’s _deductive_ _capabilities_ and his _unique_ _ability to_ _help_ _children open up and share their stories of abuse_ as well as his fluency in multiple languages and his through knowledge of theology, and Christian history,

“yeah, you’re right” Marcus said “it’s just that...”,

“you never had a normal job or had to look for a job in a normal way before” Peter said “it’s out of your comfort zone babe and that’s okay”.

Marcus nodded again, looking more relaxed, there is even e glimpse of a smile on his face when he said “alright, working on resume starting tomorrow”,

“and” said Peter cautiously “trying therapy”,

“no” Marcus said looking a little surprised by the idea “not even possible”,

“yes, it is” said Peter “also it’s necessary”,

“Peter” Marcus said trying weakly to stop his lover,

“babe listen,” Peter said firmly and with concern “you were a soldier, not the kind that a VA therapist is familiar with, but still a soldier and a child soldier for six years of your life and if counted the way Talia was conceived a sexual assault victim too”,

“I wasn’t sexually assaulted” Marcus said,

“but you were genetically raped and trying to sugarcoat it, isn’t gonna help you”.

Peter’s tone was getting intense, at this point that Addie came in and put her head on his lap, letting out a worried whine that prompted Peter to take a few deep breaths and rub her head trying to calm her down “shhhhhhhhhhhh, it’s okay Addie”, Marcus poured them both water and drained his glass slowly while finishing his plate then he finally started talking “I get what you say my love,” he spoke slowly “and I will not even deny that I need help, but how the hell am I supposed to talk about demons and demonic possessions, with 21st century therapist without getting hospitalized?”.

Peter nodded “that’s a very good question babe” he said while removing the plates from the dinner table, Marcus went to help him hoping beyond hope that this will be the end of this conversation, but his hopes were dashed when after settling next to him on the living room sofa Peter said “you are soldier Marcus and this is the answer to your problem”,

“what do you mean?” asked Marcus,

“you can learn to put the events that were most traumatizing in your career in traditional war and combat terms” Peter replied “it is kinda technically lying yes, but kinda technically isn’t, it will lead you to try techniques and methods that actually work for soldiers and some of them will work for you and help you” Marcus was looking at Peter thoughtfully now and not sure what to say “just promise me to think about it” Peter said after seeing how lost in thought his lover is and was happy to hear Marcus say “okay, I promise I’ll think of trying therapy” Peter kissed Marcus on the forehead and let him rest his head on his shoulder placing one arm around Marcus’s shoulders and letting Marcus hold onto his free hand.

Peter knows that moments of complete stillness in Marcus’s life were rare and hard to come by, so between their weekend adventures on his boat and their passionate love making every night and some mornings, he lets Marcus enjoy any moment of stillness and quite he could have like this one. Only when they’re both tired of sitting still do they get up, Marcus called his daughter and his friend and then they go to their room. Peter likes to undress Marcus slowly, admiring his lover’s body in the nice orange light of the bedside lamp and for the life of him Marcus is still unable to see the reason for this admiration, but he’s not complaining.

Once they’re both naked, Peter pushes Marcus gently to the bed, then he takes his place between Marcus’s splayed legs with one of his hands preparing a place for himself inside Marcus and the other wandering all over Marcus’s torso, whose own hands are stroking Peter’s hair, “you have no idea what having you here is doing to me, do you?” Peter askedو looking down at Marcus with a kind look, and eyes that went dark, and hand gently rubbing an ugly scar right above the navel, as if trying to erase the pain that came with it,

“no” said Marcus breathlessly as Peter’s fingers hit his prostate “tell me”,

“I’ve seen in my life people who go through hell” Peter says after kissing Marcus deeply and slowly “when they come back, they come only in body, but you” he pauses to shift his weight to push his cock inside Marcus, who locked his hands around Peter’s neck and his legs around Peter’s waist, “you went through more than one hell and you always came” Peter continued once he settled in his position “back body, mind, heart and soul. Tired yes but still so alive”.

Marcus’s tears started streaming down his face at hearing what his lover just said, and he pulled Peter closer for a kiss as he felt the other man moving inside him, both men let their minds turn off as they make love, everything outside this moment, all the fears that plagued them for the last few weeks, and the ones that have been haunting them for the last few days are now forgotten, as they lose themselves in one another. When Peter eases himself out of Marcus’s hole, he lies down on side guiding Marcus to do the same so Peter could hold him from the back tightly, kissing Marcus’s shoulder blades and the nape of his neck. Marcus goes still again, happy and relaxed but back to earth to remember the promises he made Peter tonight, and the promise he made his daughter when he saw her last to look after himself.

Tomorrow is gonna be hard but not because there are demons to face and agents of evil chasing him, it’s gonna be hard because there are no demons or agents of evil. Feeling Peter’s presence all around him, Marcus embraced the challenges that tomorrow will bring, the challenge of a life that needs to be build from the rubble of his old horrifying one, and the challenge of his dark and dismal psyche that needs to see some light to banish some of the shadows of the past, and with acceptance Marcus drifts to sleep.

The end

**Author's Note:**

> Here we go again folks, another follow up idea for my first story that demanded to be written, hope you enjoy it.


End file.
